I have to announce that my BFF Jo has managed to completely infect me with the incurable (and expensive) disease of AGD – Aquired Girliness Disease.
Once upon a time I was a happy and typically mal-adjusted girl geek. I had grown up as a tomboy and working in the software industry was comfortable to me. I worked with mostly men and my extreme lack of girliness was an advantage in being taken seriously.
I only needed to buy a couple of pairs of jeans and maybe a pair or two of sweat pants for when I didn’t get a chance to do laundry. One pair of tennis shoes. My shirts were even FREE – lots of great clothes for nothing! It rocked, really.
I must have shown a genetic disposition to AGD all along, though. I did tend to wear a wide variety of pretty bras under the product name t-shirts. But I was resisting the spread of the disease. That was merely a strange quirk and I could stop any time I wanted to.
I never changed my earrings. I rarely remembered to wear the couple of necklaces I had unless reminded. I had only one watch and it told time just fine, who needed another?
I never wore makeup, ever. Who needed war paint to make a point, I could do that really well without resorting to expensive chemicals slathered on my face and making me look like a clown.
Today I finally had to accept that Jo had pushed me into an incurable case of AGD. I have no free t-shirts left – Jo banned them. I needed to go to see my chiropractor and where I once would have tossed on a sweat shirt and some sweat pants, today I dressed in nice jeans, a stylish green shirt cut for a WOMAN, and walking shoes. I even matched my underwear and bra to my shirt!!
And I couldn’t leave the house without delving into my now considerable stash of jewelry to put on matching necklace and earrings. And a different watch because it matched my necklace better.
Then I picked up my purse – once my computer backpack or a wallet was more than sufficient. Now I have a bright silver pebbled Kathy van Zeeland bag. Hell, I paid good money for it too – despite Mr Maura claiming it looked like a refugee from a bad disco flashback. He has no taste. And it has bling – and silver charms – and a gorgeous pink interior!
I had to put on lip gloss before I left the house.
I’m so sunk – and it’s all JO’S fault.
But aren’t these the coolest shoes? I wonder if I could manage to walk in them? Hmmmmm…..
