Today’s post is really a public service announcement mixed with a plea for people to use real words, correct spellings and to be sure they know the meaning of the words they are using.
Let’s start with a confession – I am a complete anal-retentive Luddite when it comes to the use of language. This is probably because of a combination of being raised by parents with the view that it was important to know the correct words to use and to use words correctly and the fact that I work as a programming-writer and editor as well as write fiction. I realize many people will not agree with my views and that’s okay. But I’m still going to state them today.
I know it sounds terribly formal of me and maybe a tad superior but I HATE diminutives. I hate cute names for things used in place of their real names. Maybe it’s related to why I HATE text-speak. I don’t use “u” in place of “you” or other abbreviations. “Later” is not “l8r”. It makes it horribly hard for me to read and I pulls me out of anything I read it in. For heaven’s sake, don’t use text speak in business communication or professional forums. I’m not sure why this seems to have become the thing to do but I was raised with the idea of using the correct word for what I meant, not slang and not making one up. Maybe that’s why it sets my teeth on edge sometimes and I had some emails at the Evil Day Job that really made me cringe.
I hate diminutives when coming from or talking to anyone over the age of three. Lipstick is not “lippie.” A snack is not a “snackie.” A blanket is not a “blankie”. It always comes off as overly cute to me. Or overly lazy sometimes.
I hate the whole trend of creative spellings of things. Things have a defined way to spell them – USE IT. These weird spellings come across as either the person is too lazy to look up the spelling or thinks they can remake the rule. It takes me forever to sound out what is being meant and it’s just weird.
Then lets talk about using a word without knowing what it means. I have a funny (to me at least) experience to recount about this. My ex-manicurist is quite young and very prone to two of the issues I talk about in this post. She’s always using something resembling babytalk and she has used words without knowing what they mean (and certainly never tried to find out). Last year I was getting my nails done and she was chattering away, when I heard her use a very interesting word as a nonsense word. It was used where I’d consider “whatever” or “etcetera” instead. During the ninety minute appointment, she did it multiple times with that flair you see in someone that is currently in love with a new word.
Except I was sure she would not be using that word this frequently and to her business customers (many of whom are far less easy-going than I) if she knew what it meant.
Finally, after we finished, I asked her if she knew what that word meant. She waved her hands in dismissal and said “Oh, isn’t that the best nonsense word? My friend taught it to me and I think it just sounds fun.”
I had her go over to her computer and look it up in an online dictionary. She about died, turned bright red and seemed like she might faint. It was a real word, with a real meaning, and quite inappropriate to the way she was using it and the venue she was using it in. Apparently I was either the first to know what it meant or the first to be brave enough to tell her.
I made her swear to not use a new word again without knowing, for sure, what it meant.
Now, this applies to writers as well. Don’t use words in your manuscripts without knowing what they mean. Look them up. Please. And do your readers a favor and use real words with their correct spellings.
What word was my ex-manicurist using with her customers.
Smegma.
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