August 5th, 2010
Thirteen ways you know you’re an author:
- Your desk file drawer contains files and multiple kinds of chocolate.
- You get distracted during a romantic dinner listening to a fight at a nearby table and your date merely asks if you want a pen to take notes with.
- You arrive at work and don’t remember the drive there – but you have figured a way to solve your plot problem.
- You talk to your characters – and sometimes they talk back.
- You accidentally put the peanut butter in the refrigerator and the jelly in the pantry – and it’s not the first time.
- You could open an office supply store with the contents of your office.
- You choose music according to the story you are writing.
- You know every research site on the web that has anything to do with what you are writing – and visit them all far too frequently “just to check a quick fact.”
- You obsesses about wordcount – even when you’ve declared you have a day off.
- You try to blame your muse for all bad jokes, puns and suggestive comments that escape your lips (or fingers).
- You cannot help but shudder at bad grammar or punctuation and think “they’re editor will kill them.”
- Your friends constantly follow up their news and tales of woe with “promise me you won’t use that in a story.”
- You do use your friends in stories and can lie about it with an almost straight face.
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