July 5th, 2011
Lessons Learned on Phone Typing with Ferrets

While visiting a friend’s house yesterday, I attempted to learn the new technology of Ferret Phone Typing (FPT). ¬†I had been informed that my friend’s ferrets had been used to demonstrate this technology in the past and thought I, as a new user of FPT, might be able to make use of these already skilled ferrets and my own Windows Phone 7.

In the course of this hands-on learning experience, I discovered some key tips I’d like to pass along to anyone else who may seek to try FPT.

  1. FPT requires that you  determine whether you are left-ferreted or right-ferreted ahead of time. Use of the incorrect ferret orientation can lead to both an unacceptable number of errors and even dropping of the phone device while trying to utilize the ferret.
  2. FPT should be attempted by gently scruffing the ferret in use and touch its nose gently to the phone in use. Note that the phone may need to be cleaned frequently and excessive use of the same ferret may result in phone damage due to gnawing.
  3. FPT has a limited session time so it’s best to compose only short messages that can be easily completed during that session time. If longer messages are desired, multiple FPT sessions may be required.
  4. FPT is not suitable for children as the ferret cannot be adequately controlled by a child to have achieve the precision necessary for FPT.
  5. FPT is best accomplished using ferrets that are not already in “war mode.” Typically, ferrets that are just waking up or trying to sleep make the best FPT devices.
  6. FPT should only be attempted with ferrets that have recently visited the litterbox as the ferret in use may become annoyed at process and make that annoyance known in a rather unpleasant manner.
(Note: No ferrets were harmed in the development of Ferret Phone Typing but I almost passed out when I was laughing so hard I couldn’t breath. The ferrets were not as amused, though.)

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